Britney Fails Drug Test. Finally it’s happened! We all knew it would we just didn’t know when. Britney Spears has failed one of her court-ordered drug tests. Her urine test came back positive and already “sources” are saying that it is a false reading. False, my ass! She’s a drug head and we all now officially know it! Mark Vincent Kaplan, Kevin Federline’s lawyer, is going to court Wednesday to show the judge a video of Britney running a red light. He is pushing for Britney to lose the privilege of driving her sons around when she is with them. I agree! I think he should also push to give Britney a mandatory bath and teeth brushing! Amen! (Source)

Prince Harry is Single. Prince Harry and his girlfriend of three years, Chelsy Davy, have broken up. Reports say that she broke up with him over the phone. Apparently Chelsy was sick of her man getting hammered all the time and cheating on her with random breezies. Hey, Chelsy, if you want to marry him and ride the gravy train for the rest of your life then get a hobby and turn the other cheek. Take a note from Carmela Soprano! (Source)

Nicolette Sheridan is Pregnant, Maybe. Desperate Housewives actress Nicolette Sheridan is 44 years old and rumored to be pregnant with her fiances baby. Her fiance, Michael Bolton, is 54 years old. Both of these people are hot for being past the baby-having age and they’re loaded so they can handle it. Hell, its probably better for mature people like this to have a baby then partying-young couples like Nicole Richie and Joel Madden. If it’s true, I hope it’s healthy and wish ‘em the best. If Nancy Grace can do it then Edie Britt can do it too! (Source)

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Had a Baby. Weighing in a 7 lbs 15 ounces, The View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck and her NFL star husband Tim Hasselbeck welcomed a baby boy on Friday in Arizona. The baby’s name will be announced on The View on Monday with Elisabeth calling in from Arizona. Cheesy! Plus I don’t care what the baby’s name is. I just hope the producers of that show wise up and don’t invite Elisabeth back. I’m so sick of her loud mouth, honestly! (Source)

Everybody Hates Tom. According to sources, all of the celebrities that Tom Cruise does movies with absolutely cannot stand him. The American Museum of Moving Image’s just honored Tom Cruise but his Lions for Lambs co-stars, Robert Redford and Meryl Streep, weren’t there because they can’t stand his ass! Maybe they think Scientology is a load of crap or maybe they’re just annoyed of Tom because he’s got little man syndrome? For me it’s both! (Source)