Isn’t that picture of Jamie Lynn Spears and Sean Preston Federline so cute? I thought so. I don’t know what trailer they’re in, but they look cute. I’d rather look at them than fugly Britney so that’s why I’ve put that picture up. TRUST–I know it’s not Britney.

So, Britney Spears was supposed to have her first monitored visit with her two sons, Sean Preston Federline, 2, and Jayden James, 1, today at her Malibu mansion. But of course, Britney let them down. (Or did them a favor because now that I think about it, they probably hate her.) Apparently, Kevin’s people were at Britney’s gate, trying to get a hold of her via the intercom so she could open the gate and let them in, but Britney never answered. Here’s what Life & Style Magazine says happened:

“She and Alli [Sims] headed to Brit’s Malibu house. They went to sleep as soon as they got there. Brit was up in plenty of time to prepare for the boys’ visit at 10 a.m. But she waited, and waited, and they didn’t show up. Alli’s cellphone rang, and it was Kevin [Federline’s] people, saying that the boys were going back to Kevin because she hadn’t answered the intercom at the gate!”

“Brit didn’t realize the intercom wasn’t working. She begged them to bring the boys back. But they wouldn’t. She was devastated that they wouldn’t turn around.”

Umm, a few things. One, can we please stop calling her “Brit” like she’s our cute, teenage friend because she’s NOT, two, can we please not use the word devastated when referring to how Britney feels about anything cause it’s clear she just don’t give a damn, and three, can Alli Sims please get a clue and start doing something productive for Britney other than be her fugly sidekick? Ok, thanks! I’m so sick of Britney today. I promise no more posts about her.

The verdict is in! The jury is back! However the hell that saying goes. After spending 3 hours in court today, Kevin Federline officially has full (temporary) custody of his two sons, Sean Preston and Jayden James. What does that leave for mother Britney Spears? She gets monitored visitation… if she even gives a crap. This arrangement will go on until the next hearing which is scheduled for October 26th. There were rumors that since Britney didn’t show up for court today that she was back in rehab, but just hours later she was spotted out and about. Of course she didn’t go to rehab! If someone wants to start a rumor they should say she overdosed. That’s way more believable. I think the real question here is… does K-Fed even want the kids? I say give them to Lynne Spears. Seriously!

(I know this post has nothing to do with nasty Paris Hilton, but I couldn’t resist!)

Kevin Federline is winning his battle against his ex-wife Britney Spears. Kevin has alleged her as an unfit mother and, sadly, it’s turning out to be true. Yesterday, a judge ordered Britney Spears to give up full custody of her boys by October 3rd at noon. She’s already given them up. What did she do after? Go tanning and get photographed looking really happy. Britney’s lawyer, surprisingly, told the truth about the situation. He said,

“We weren’t able to prove compliance with what the judge ordered.” “Specifically, the judge ordered that by 10 a.m. (Monday) morning, both parties show valid

California driving licenses. I’ve been unable to produce evidence of that.” 

“There was a claim by Mr. Federline’s attorney that she had not complied with a previous order the court had made – before I came on board (as lawyer)– about having a random drug and alcohol test.”  ”There’s no evidence that she actually failed a test.“

Maybe she hasn’t failed the test but she has yet to take it which is basically the same thing. If you’re clean, why wouldn’t you take the test? EXACTLY! I’m sick of Britney’s drama. I almost wish Lindsay Lohan was out of rehab already.

(I think it’s funny that somehow I’ve let Sean Preston Federline get his own category, but I’m sure once he grows up we’ll have a lot to put under it!)

Remember this morning when I wrote that Kevin Federline was turning Britney Spears in for driving with their two sons without a license? Well, I guess that worked out for K-Fed because TMZ is reporting that Britney Spears has lost custody of her two sons.

L.A. County Superior Court Judge Scott Gordon issued an order today, stating that Kevin Federline, the boys’ father, “is to retain physical custody of the minor children on Wednesday, October 3, 2007 at 12:00 PM until further order of the court.”

I like this judge. He’s the same guy that is drug-testing Britney Spears twice a week. This guy, whether Britney can see it now or not, is trying to help her. Why can’t she just TAKE THE HELP!? I wonder if she’s going crazy about this news or if she’s happy? She doesn’t seem to give a crap about those kids.

I thought Crystal Pepsi would make a comeback before Kevin Federline would be turning in Britney Spears! Honestly! But I guess I was quite wrong. Life & Style Magazine is reporting that Kevin Federline and his lawyer, Mark Vincent Kaplan, is going to the LA Superior Court this morning to turn Britney Spears in for driving on a suspended license. Oh, snap! Apparently, Kevin Federline saw the pictures of Britney driving their two sons around over the weekend and doesn’t like it at all! (Yeah right, homeboy wants the cash and will stop at nothing to get it!)

Britney’s rep could not be reached for comment on the matter but why would they? Do they exist? Does Britney even have a rep, besides herself? It just keeps getting worse for her, I swear! And she brings it all on herself! Damn!

Britney Spears! I say that with an exclamation point because we’ve talked about her so much lately, I think I’m actually going mad over it. Honestly. Well, as crazy as I feel, the show must go on! Britney Spears went to court with her ex-husband Kevin Federline today and the judge ruled straight down the line. Here are the results:

Britney Spears has to be tested twice weekly for drugs and alcohol

Custody of their two sons is 50/50 for now

Kevin, Britney, and their families are not allowed to talk badly about one another or anyone they are associated with

Kevin, Britney, and their families are not allowed to use corporal punishment on the boys

Kevin and Britney must complete a “Parenting Without Conflict” class in addition to taking a co-parenting counseling session together

Kevin and Britney are NOT allowed to drink or take controlled substances while they are with their children or for the 12 hours leading up to taking care of their children

The judge also said that he thinks Britney has a “habitual, frequent, and continuous” drug and alcohol problem. He totally called it! She does! I hope this little meeting opens up her sagging, worn-out eyes. She could seriously lose her kids, career, all her money and her support system if she doesn’t turn it around this time. Honestly!