You know those rumors about Nicole Richie being pregnant? Well, as you already know, they get worse. It seems that Nicole isn’t sure who the daddy is. And our choices of reliable men who would make good fathers are slim. It seems that Nicole Richie only hooks up with guys who are only slightly more intelligent than K-Fed. Rumors are going that she doesn’t know who the daddy is and here are the choices:

The National Enquirer has claimed that Joel Madden may not be the Daddy. They report that there were 4 guys in Nicole’s life before she found out she was pregnant.
Although Nicole has yet to confirm her pregnancy, the source also claims that paternity tests will be done to find out if Joel is the Daddy.
The reported four dudes on the hook until paternity tests can confirm the Daddy are…Joel Madden, DJ AM, Brody Jenner and Jeff Goldblum.

Jeff Goldblum. Humm. Isn’t he the guy who gets eaten by a dinosaur while he’s going poop in Jurassic Park? To me, Jeff Goldblum has always been a low-rent version of Howie Mandell. And even then, if it wasn’t for Bobby’s World, Howie Mandell kinda sucks, too. I still say we cross our fingers and hope she isn’t pregnant in the first place!

If there’s a bigger douche bag out there than wanna-be celebrity Spencer Pratt, please feel free to let me know. Because as of now, I can’t think of anyone as desperate as he is. It seems like he is always stirring up drama or putting in his two cents when no one really gives a damn. He’s kind of like Candy Spelling in that respect, isn’t he? Anyway, apparently Joel Madden has beef with him for talking ish about Nicole Richie. It’s two pathetic dudes, trying desperately to keep themselves in the limelight. It seems that Spencer and Heidi were having a nice, romantic lunch together at the Beverly Hills Hotel when Joel Madden and Nicole Richie approached Spencer’s table and said, “You’ve been talking shit about my girl!” Classy. Spencer said it was all a misunderstanding. Spoken like a true douche bag. He told In Touch Weekly,

“It all stems from an interview in Details ages ago where I was misquoted, calling Nicole a skinny bitch. It’s all a misunderstanding. I’ve always thought she’s a really nice girl and I wouldn’t call her that.“

Umm, Spencer, you’re a little suck up! It would be more of a burn on him if Joel Madden told him that it doesn’t matter if he’s talking about Nicole because he isn’t even famous! You know he’d be butt hurt about that more than getting called out. (I just re-read the story and realized what complete idiots all of these people are. Put them all in jail just to get them out of the news.)

Earlier I had reported that perhaps Nicole Richie was pregnant, because those rumors were flying around. I sort of thought she was just messing with the pap, because she was covering her belly with this shitty grin on her face. Now multiple magazines are reporting that she is, in fact, pregnant. Can you be a bulemic coke head and still have a baby? I don’t think so, but whatever.

Star Magazine is reporting that not only is The Simple Life star pregnant, but she’s 12 weeks along and she’s having a little boy. The baby, of course, is fathered by Joel Madden who is Richie’s boyfriend. The couple were spotted buying thousands of dollars worth of boy baby stuff at Bel Bambini. A source in the store said,

I asked them if they were shopping for a friend and they said, no. It was obvious they were buying for themselves. When they got to the register, Nicole whispered to Joel, ‘Wait till my dad finds out.’ She was giddy the entire time, and you could tell she was excited to be there.

Well it’s great to know she’s excited but I think all these skinny bitches don’t realize that once you have a kid, it’s there forever. Someone should say to Nicole, “Hey, you know how Paris Hilton has herpes forever? Well a baby is like that. A baby is like herpes.”

Hmm. Perhaps that sounded far smoother in my head. But seriously. She can’t just discard the kid once she’s done with Joel Madden. Jesus, the Duffster must be on the verge of suicide.

I am still hoping this story isn’t true!