The View added a guy to the gab on Monday: 2-month, 2-days-old Taylor Thomas Hasselbeck, whose mother, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, returned to the ABC daytime show with her baby in her arms.

“I thought I’d bring a little testosterone to the table today,” said Hasselbeck, as Taylor alternated between being wide-eyed in his new environment and crying like a baby for co-hosts Whoopi Goldberg, Joy Behar and Sherri Shepherd (Barbara Walters was said to be on assignment).

“He’s huge,” she admitted. “He’s almost like 12 pounds, I think. He’s just constantly on me. I call myself the Dairy Queen.”

Hasselbeck also said that Taylor bites her boobs, which, she also admitted, “are huge.”

Having announced her pregnancy in April, Hasselbeck, 30, began her maternity leave on Oct. 23.

Taylor was born Nov. 9, 2007. Dad is Hasselbeck’s husband, Arizona Cardinals quarterback Tim Hasselbeck.

The couple also have another child, Grace, 2, whom her mother described on Monday’s View as “such a good big sister.”

As for Hasselbeck’s very fit shape, Shepherd said, “You don’t even look like you were pregnant.”

“Wear prints,” Hasselbeck said, revealing her secret.

People

Seriously, how do you hear this name and not bring up JTT?

I remember when I was in 4th grade, Jonathan Taylor Thomas was a hot commodity. His face was all over those Tiger Beat magazines and all the little girls had these cheesy posters of him all over their room. I mean, I’m sure half of the people who watched Home Improvement were watching to see JTT, cause that show really wasn’t all that funny. Oh and they sure as hell weren’t watching to see that kid who played the younger brother Mark. Wasn’t he the homeliest kid you’ve ever seen? He totally was.

I don’t understand why Elisabeth Hasselbeck would name her son Taylor Thomas because everyone on the planet knows all about JTT and they’re going to say, “Why did you name your kid after the gay guy on Home Improvement?” Elisabeth is retarded, though, so it makes sense.

Maybe she’ll get pregnant again and name her daughter Joan Hart. Or maybe Michelle Gellar or Jessica Parker. You never know!

If you’d like to see the clip of Elisabeth calling into The View and breaking the baby name news, you can see that clip here. She also shows some pictures of him but he’s a baby a couple days old so you pretty much know what he looks like. Once he grows horns and a tail like his mom, then he’ll be a sight to see. Until then, it’s just a newborn with a red face and a rich mom!

Britney Fails Drug Test. Finally it’s happened! We all knew it would we just didn’t know when. Britney Spears has failed one of her court-ordered drug tests. Her urine test came back positive and already “sources” are saying that it is a false reading. False, my ass! She’s a drug head and we all now officially know it! Mark Vincent Kaplan, Kevin Federline’s lawyer, is going to court Wednesday to show the judge a video of Britney running a red light. He is pushing for Britney to lose the privilege of driving her sons around when she is with them. I agree! I think he should also push to give Britney a mandatory bath and teeth brushing! Amen! (Source)

Prince Harry is Single. Prince Harry and his girlfriend of three years, Chelsy Davy, have broken up. Reports say that she broke up with him over the phone. Apparently Chelsy was sick of her man getting hammered all the time and cheating on her with random breezies. Hey, Chelsy, if you want to marry him and ride the gravy train for the rest of your life then get a hobby and turn the other cheek. Take a note from Carmela Soprano! (Source)

Nicolette Sheridan is Pregnant, Maybe. Desperate Housewives actress Nicolette Sheridan is 44 years old and rumored to be pregnant with her fiances baby. Her fiance, Michael Bolton, is 54 years old. Both of these people are hot for being past the baby-having age and they’re loaded so they can handle it. Hell, its probably better for mature people like this to have a baby then partying-young couples like Nicole Richie and Joel Madden. If it’s true, I hope it’s healthy and wish ‘em the best. If Nancy Grace can do it then Edie Britt can do it too! (Source)

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Had a Baby. Weighing in a 7 lbs 15 ounces, The View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck and her NFL star husband Tim Hasselbeck welcomed a baby boy on Friday in Arizona. The baby’s name will be announced on The View on Monday with Elisabeth calling in from Arizona. Cheesy! Plus I don’t care what the baby’s name is. I just hope the producers of that show wise up and don’t invite Elisabeth back. I’m so sick of her loud mouth, honestly! (Source)

Everybody Hates Tom. According to sources, all of the celebrities that Tom Cruise does movies with absolutely cannot stand him. The American Museum of Moving Image’s just honored Tom Cruise but his Lions for Lambs co-stars, Robert Redford and Meryl Streep, weren’t there because they can’t stand his ass! Maybe they think Scientology is a load of crap or maybe they’re just annoyed of Tom because he’s got little man syndrome? For me it’s both! (Source)

I guess Rosie O’Donnell doesn’t hold grudges! Back in May when Rosie and Elisabeth had their infamous fight on The View, the two seemed to be frenemies. Now Rosie is burying the hatchet by sending Hasselbeck, who is pregnant and due this month, gifts for her and the baby. How mature of her. Sort of surprising isn’t it?

According to a source, Rosie dropped almost $600 at L.A. baby boutique Petit Trésor on Oct. 25 on gifts for Elisabeth, who is expecting her second child. “Rosie’s assistant called the store and ordered a $290 Lulla Smith white silk Moses basket and a $285 christening gown for the baby. “She asked for the gifts to be wrapped up and sent them to Elizabeth’s new address in Arizona.”

If it’s true, it’s a nice gesture. I don’t think Elisabeth deserves it by any means and I really doubt she’ll appreciate it, either but whatever. Score one for Rosie on the maturity side. And hey, did you guys watch the Today show when Giadi announced she was pregnant with a baby girl? Watching her transformation should be fun!

As a fellow Elisabeth Hasselbeck hater, I definitely am siding with Barry Manilow on this one. Of course, my reasons for disliking Elisabeth are purely superficial, as always, but whatever, right? I mean, I’m sure if I could stand her long enough to hear her views, I’d probably dislike her for that but I can’t stand her voice. She may be cute for a mom but she’s a biotch. Barry was going to be on The View but the producers said Barry had to cooperate. He couldn’t.

“I wanted to let you know that I will no longer be on The View tomorrow as scheduled. I had made a request that I be interviewed by Joy, Barbara or Whoopi but not Elisabeth Hasselback. Unfortunately, the show was not willing to accommodate this simple request, so I bowed out.”

Simple request! Ha! If you think about it, it would be such a burn on Elisabeth if he was on the show and she wasn’t allowed to talk. Awesome! Add Barry Manilow to my list of (my) Monday heroes that make me happy. (See below for confusion!)

This is funny and I wish there was more of a story to it. Obviously Alicia Silverstone is a Rosie O’Donnell fan because after Rosie and Elisabeth Hasselbeck got into it on The View yesterday, Alicia came out and dogged Elisabeth. I am not a fan of Rosie because I think she’s uber obnoxious and sort of misleading, but I especially hate Elisabeth Hasselbeck. She’s a little naggy annoying biatch. So when I heard they got in a fight, I was happy to see it because I couldn’t care either way how it ended. But I gotta tell ya, I’m happy to see Alicia dogg Elisabeth. Girlfriend needs a reality check like that.

Check out the video if you haven’t already seen it. I love how Elisabeth just sort of awkwardly puts her hands down and turns around. Ha! She got totally owned.