If you aren’t sure who Ted Casablanca is, let me fill you in. He writes a blog called The Awful Truth that is featured on the E! website and he’s extremely annoying. I’m not sure if he’s annoying because he’s a metro old guy who desperately wants to be important or if he’s just annoying because he writes like a 13-year old over AOL but either way, he’s annoying. Anyway, he’s claiming he believes that Paris Hilton could be pregnant with boyfriend Benji Madden’s baby. Why, you ask? Here’s why, according to good ‘ol Teddy’s ramblings:

She’s not drinking. It’s the first time I’ve never seen her do that.”
Above source is a firsthand, regular and up close observer of Paris Hilton and her horniness, hotness and sometimes tankedlicious goings on. Said insider’s been posing and preening right alongside Ms. H at a few recent T-town soirees. Gosh, is this the new, freshly domesticated Mrs.-Madden-to-be Paris or Paris the teetotalist, perhaps (for whatever reason)? Or, to get very National Enquirer about it (as if there were any diff here at A.T., I mean, really), could this possibly be the new preggers Paris? Just a pregnant pause, or hunch, that’s all, babes. See, when the regularly guzzling heiress suddenly cleans up her vodka-happy act, hon-pies, somethin’s up. Fer sure.”

Translation of that tween talk: Paris isn’t drinking and she’s usually a drunken mess so she may be with child. All the rest of that shit above is just frill. Oh, and just so he knows, “fer sure” isn’t funny or cool or witty. It’s quite annoying, actually so Ted, please stop.

I doubt Paris is pregnant but I could see her faking it for attention. She is a huge attention whore… among other things, of course.

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden are still, surprisingly enough, going strong. These pictures indicate perhaps they are a bit too happy. When you’re a bulimic crack head you look pregnant after you digest even the smallest of meals. So, Paris could have just eaten dinner. OR… as the media loves to speculate, she could be pregnant. Does she look like she has a little baby bloat to you?

 

Well that didn’t take long. After less than two months of dating, Paris Hilton – whose romance with rocker Benji Madden blossomed seemingly overnight – is ready to use the l-word.

“I’ve never felt so happy and in love,” she declared in a post on her MySpace Celebrity blog Tuesday. “He’s such an amazing guy and life has never been better.”

For the past month the hotel heiress, 27, has been touring – hitting Europe and Africa – with Madden and his band, Good Charlotte.

“It’s so much fun going to their shows every night, I now know every song by heart,” Hilton wrote. “All the guys in the band are so cool and sweet and it’s been such an amazing and memorable experience.”

PEOPLE 

Paris Hilton gets around, seriously. I mean.. just think about all you’ve read about her and different dudes. It’s sick!

Less than two weeks after Benji Madden split from fiancée Sophie Monk, the rocker is stepping out with another blonde bombshell. The new woman in his life? None other than Paris Hilton.

“Yes, they are dating. It’s pretty serious,” a source confirms of the couple, who have been spotted together all over town – make that all over the country! In just the past few days, they have partied at Home nightclub in suburban St. Louis, shopped (while holding hands) at Hollywood’s Fred Segal, and even grabbed lunch with Madden’s mom.

On Sunday night, the two hit the Polo Lounge at the Beverly Hills Hotel, where they cuddled in a massive booth and engaged in an intimate conversation.

The apparent love connection is certainly convenient: His twin brother, Joel, dates Hilton’s B.F.F., Nicole Richie.

PEOPLE